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fragments 

One Island 

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fragments/work in progress

Letters to X

October 15, 2021

 

 

Dear X,

 

I hear your broadcasts. I pick up your signal now and then. I like that song you sing. Or is it a chant? It is very soothing.

 

I heard you wonder why maps mark forests that are not there. I wonder that too. In the desert where I live, light blue shapes appear on our maps. Like a miracle, those rivers (now yellow) let you walk across, dust waking behind you.

 

I wonder what bones, what relics, I might find if I were to dig into the rubble of the Santa Clara River. Which gentle creatures, which human animals remain there, curled and stirring among the rocks? When I have asked these questions of the hot wind, all I seem to get is static.

 

I hope we can dance together very soon.

 

Love,

December 2, 2021

 

 

Dear X,

 

I listened to part of a conversation on the radio today. They spoke about death and milk and captains, mapping and fucking, and a dog scratching. I was reminded of that line to let the soft animal of my body love what it loves. I don’t remember where it's from, or at least that’s what I tell myself when my mouth goes dry. What is that animal breathing inside me and will it die like everything else? What do you think, X?

 

Love.

October 11, 2021

 

 

Dear X,

 

I don’t know who you are or anything about you. I can say that I know more about you than I know about myself. It makes me think that maybe I should try to make a map of myself. Too self-indulgent. So, I take a less direct route toward the same end: I go backward in time, to try to map a history of the people who came before me, where they lived and died and gave birth and paid taxes and crossed oceans and married and stole carriages and went to jail and remarried and shot rabbits. It is all just dates and scribblings and hearsay, but I latch onto what stories I can. I excavate and extract the insides of a creature I hope to become.

 

I wonder if any of this is helpful. . .

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